Well, its 9.15 and I’ve decided to do another Blog post tonight because somebody asked me (what I consider to be)
a very relevant question.
Hailey asked me:
How is it that you can, after so much time has passed, still keep an objective recollection of the events that surrounded you/ Highgate/ etc.? I have always been so interested, absolutely absorbed with you and your Highgate debacle. Of course, it was easier to care deeply about it when I was younger and didn’t have to deal with the comings and goings on of maturity. Awful reality of life at times. But I digress–
I want to know how it is that you are able to look at the events of your life, that you were involved in and that you voraciously believed in– and still hold onto your perspective in the face of those who maliciously tried to discredit you?
Have a lovely day, David–
This might be a fairly complex question, but it is nice to be asked a sensible question for a change (and ‘yes’ I’m talking about you two, Cat and Craig!).
Its so difficult sometimes because my life has always been slightly traumatic! And obviously there’s just some things I’d rather just not remember. But I guess that as a writer, there’s just some things that you have to do, especially when writing an autobiography and people want to know what the truth actually involved.
I should explain, that when I wrote most of the book, it was done in prison and everything was somehow more ‘acute’; and many events were not so far ‘back’ in the past. As a matter of fact, most of what I wrote had to be ‘smuggled out’ of prison as the Home Office wouldn’t allow any mention of legal disputes or prison conditions. I was given the option of writing it but the condition was it had to be submitted to the Home Office for approval at the end of my sentence. I simply refused, so did it the ‘hard way’. That’s really another story, but the point is that when I was released in July 1976, I had a full (but jumbled) hand-written manuscript to work from. Many things became ‘crystal clear’ while I was in that dingy cell, and I decided to get them all down on paper properly typed. And I did!
I suppose that’s one reason why things were so easy to remember. They were somehow ‘magnified’ without the usual distractions.
There are many things I contemplated (in 1976) leaving out of the book altogether. But then I thought ‘no’, its got to be truthful or there’s no point in writing it. In other words its ‘all or nothing’ – even if some events might have otherwise be seen to put me in a ‘bad light’. I guess I partly reasoned, I couldn’t have a worse reputation that the one I’d already been given by the Press, Courts and certain ‘other people’ (who I won’t mention here!), so it really didn’t make that much difference.
So I think that’s really the basic answer to your question, Hailey. The other point, of course, is that I’ve always been gifted with a fairly good memory; although the latter is also probably due to the fact I was deeply involved in mysticism, which teaches – among other things – the importance of developing a ‘clear mind’; that is, ‘uncluttered by ‘material things, which I hope makes sense!
So, I hope that answers your question. And thank you because it was an important question and I’m sure one that many people would have wanted me to explain.
Thank you again for posting and if there’s anything I may have inadvertently left out, please do just ask again!
Yours for the moment,